Wednesday, May 20, 2020

Digital Dreamscape (Failed Careers WIP)

Electric Bastionland is extremely cool and fun, you should buy it. I did, and now I'm partially obsessed with the electrified super-dense cityscape it helps you imagine. One of the defining aspects of the game is the 100+ two page spreads stylishly depicting your character's potential failed career, and I think they're so cool. Lists are the best, I love em'. Things like Warhammer Fantasy Roleplay and Pokemon appeal to me strongly because of the sheer volume of interesting and aesthetic things on offer. 

I immediately needed to create my own list of failed careers for a Bastion-adjacent setting, for funsies. Here's 36 ideas. I'm kinda grappling with the idea of the failed career vs just, actually being the thing. 

Inspo/Vibes: The future that is Aku, Cursed Earth, Rifts, Memey, 5th element, Idiocracy

A potential party
Career - Quip/D6 Question Prompt 1/D6 Table Prompt 2

1. Public Transporter - You moved the people/what did you pilot?/How do you manage?

2. Modest Luxury Dealer - You sold cheap comforts that evidently no-one needed./what did you sell?/Hows business?

3. Motorbike Jouster - You used to have a motorbike, but now you rely on pedal power./What was your gang like?/what happened to your bike?

4. Armed Parcel Porter - 2 day guaranteed delivery requires a small army/best tip?/what was your last delivery?

5. Snake Gatherer - they brought in the snakes to get the rats, they brought you in to get the snakes/what's your method?/How do you unwind?

6. Stilt-bot Pilot - Your walker brought you closer to the sky, now you long to be high again/What do you use to chase the sky?/How did you lose your license?

7. Sword Fetishist - Collecting ornamental edged objects wasn't just a hobby, but an obsession/What did you keep?/Who bought your collection?

8. Ritual Sacrifice - You were groomed as an offering, unfortunately you're still with us./Who was your intended recipient?/Who backed out?

9. Curse Eater - Your only commodity was your willingness to take on the misfortune of others/With what were you compensated?/How does your curse manifest?

10. Animal Fist Initiate - You were accepted into an elite martial arts school, they want their secrets back./What school were you in?/How were you disgraced?

11. Man in Black - They were supposed to erase your memory, but pieces keep coming back./What do you remember?/What are your nightmares of?

12. Embarrassed Millionaire - You were once fabulously wealthy, you are grossly unfamiliar with any adversity/What token of wealth do you retain?/Where did the money go?

13. Sanctioned Drug Dealer - "Pharmacist? What's a pharmacist?"/What was in demand?/Who defended you in court?

14. Foolish Warrior - Wielding a magic sword, flung forward in time by a dark wizard./When are you from?/Your magic sword

15. Amateur Ninja - You learned ninjitsu from a VHS tape, they repo'd most of your gear./What do you still have?/Who is your ninja rival?

16. Two-Tone Army - Gigs don't pay the way they used to. You never got paid at all./How many of you are there?/What's the beat?

17. Arcane Mechanic - You dialed in crystal calibrators and checked powdered scorpion levels, not much stuck./What's your hobby?/What was the shop specialty?

18. Zodiac Knight - You dreamed of serving the house of astrologers, once./Which sign were you sworn to?/What does your family think?

19. Wastelander - The backwoods are unforgiving, you crawled to the city lights./How did the backwoods change you?/Who did you leave behind?

20. Professional Placeholder - Everything has a wait time, people paid you to hold their place in the queue./How patient are you?/What's that in your pocket?

21. Mimic Tamer - Mimics are lonely monsters that hide behind mundanity. You could relate./What was the act like?/

22. Toon - It's not your fault, you're just drawn that way./What's in your back pocket?/What is your aesthetic?

23. Witch Finder - "Witch search-and-rescue unit" isn't as snappy./What was your specialty?/Who couldn't you find?

24. Imaginary Friend - Born from a child's imagination, you have outlived your purpose

25. Bear & Bird - Not unlike a Moose & Squirrel/What tricks do you know?/Who's your nemesis?

26. Toad Sage - You failed to uphold your pact with the toad spirits, but you still have their email/Secret toad art?/Vice?

27. Queen of games - You possessed an artifact that housed an ancient spirit, it blessed you with incredible gaming ability/Who was this spirit/What's your game?

28. Champion Brick Thrower - You were good, but not the best

29. Service Android - You're wildly outdated. Android enthusiasts are surprised to see you functioning/Prime Directive?/Passion?

30. Pedestrian Hero - Your only power is your indomitable confidence/What's your signature move? How do you traverse the city?

31. Great Ape Cultist - Our ape overlords will come from beyond the stars and rule us as gods

32. Negative Vampire - Your body rejected the worst of the vampire curse, but you're still a carrier.

33. Bison Cleric - Strong and unyielding, bison worship is a common faith in the backwoods

34. Clone of Rick Astley - You hearts been aching but you're too shy to say it

35. Full Conversion Cyborg - You wouldn't or couldn't go through with the whole procedure, glitches are common

36. Arachnoid - A mild mannered spider, bitten by a radioactive man. You retain the worst traits of both man and arachnid.

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Digital Dreamscape (Failed Careers WIP)

Electric Bastionland is extremely cool and fun, you should buy it . I did, and now I'm partially obsessed with the electrified super-d...