Electric Bastionland is extremely cool and fun, you should buy it. I did, and now I'm partially obsessed with the electrified super-dense cityscape it helps you imagine. One of the defining aspects of the game is the 100+ two page spreads stylishly depicting your character's potential failed career, and I think they're so cool. Lists are the best, I love em'. Things like Warhammer Fantasy Roleplay and Pokemon appeal to me strongly because of the sheer volume of interesting and aesthetic things on offer.
I immediately needed to create my own list of failed careers for a Bastion-adjacent setting, for funsies. Here's 36 ideas. I'm kinda grappling with the idea of the failed career vs just, actually being the thing.
Inspo/Vibes: The future that is Aku, Cursed Earth, Rifts, Memey, 5th element, Idiocracy
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| A potential party |
Career - Quip/D6 Question Prompt 1/D6 Table Prompt 2
1. Public Transporter - You moved the people/what did you pilot?/How do you manage?
2. Modest Luxury Dealer - You sold cheap comforts that evidently no-one needed./what did you sell?/Hows business?
3. Motorbike Jouster - You used to have a motorbike, but now you rely on pedal power./What was your gang like?/what happened to your bike?
4. Armed Parcel Porter - 2 day guaranteed delivery requires a small army/best tip?/what was your last delivery?
5. Snake Gatherer - they brought in the snakes to get the rats, they brought you in to get the snakes/what's your method?/How do you unwind?
6. Stilt-bot Pilot - Your walker brought you closer to the sky, now you long to be high again/What do you use to chase the sky?/How did you lose your license?
7. Sword Fetishist - Collecting ornamental edged objects wasn't just a hobby, but an obsession/What did you keep?/Who bought your collection?
8. Ritual Sacrifice - You were groomed as an offering, unfortunately you're still with us./Who was your intended recipient?/Who backed out?
9. Curse Eater - Your only commodity was your willingness to take on the misfortune of others/With what were you compensated?/How does your curse manifest?
10. Animal Fist Initiate - You were accepted into an elite martial arts school, they want their secrets back./What school were you in?/How were you disgraced?
11. Man in Black - They were supposed to erase your memory, but pieces keep coming back./What do you remember?/What are your nightmares of?
12. Embarrassed Millionaire - You were once fabulously wealthy, you are grossly unfamiliar with any adversity/What token of wealth do you retain?/Where did the money go?
13. Sanctioned Drug Dealer - "Pharmacist? What's a pharmacist?"/What was in demand?/Who defended you in court?
14. Foolish Warrior - Wielding a magic sword, flung forward in time by a dark wizard./When are you from?/Your magic sword
15. Amateur Ninja - You learned ninjitsu from a VHS tape, they repo'd most of your gear./What do you still have?/Who is your ninja rival?
16. Two-Tone Army - Gigs don't pay the way they used to. You never got paid at all./How many of you are there?/What's the beat?
17. Arcane Mechanic - You dialed in crystal calibrators and checked powdered scorpion levels, not much stuck./What's your hobby?/What was the shop specialty?
18. Zodiac Knight - You dreamed of serving the house of astrologers, once./Which sign were you sworn to?/What does your family think?
19. Wastelander - The backwoods are unforgiving, you crawled to the city lights./How did the backwoods change you?/Who did you leave behind?
20. Professional Placeholder - Everything has a wait time, people paid you to hold their place in the queue./How patient are you?/What's that in your pocket?
21. Mimic Tamer - Mimics are lonely monsters that hide behind mundanity. You could relate./What was the act like?/
22. Toon - It's not your fault, you're just drawn that way./What's in your back pocket?/What is your aesthetic?
23. Witch Finder - "Witch search-and-rescue unit" isn't as snappy./What was your specialty?/Who couldn't you find?
24. Imaginary Friend - Born from a child's imagination, you have outlived your purpose
25. Bear & Bird - Not unlike a Moose & Squirrel/What tricks do you know?/Who's your nemesis?
26. Toad Sage - You failed to uphold your pact with the toad spirits, but you still have their email/Secret toad art?/Vice?
27. Queen of games - You possessed an artifact that housed an ancient spirit, it blessed you with incredible gaming ability/Who was this spirit/What's your game?
28. Champion Brick Thrower - You were good, but not the best
29. Service Android - You're wildly outdated. Android enthusiasts are surprised to see you functioning/Prime Directive?/Passion?
30. Pedestrian Hero - Your only power is your indomitable confidence/What's your signature move? How do you traverse the city?
31. Great Ape Cultist - Our ape overlords will come from beyond the stars and rule us as gods
32. Negative Vampire - Your body rejected the worst of the vampire curse, but you're still a carrier.
33. Bison Cleric - Strong and unyielding, bison worship is a common faith in the backwoods
34. Clone of Rick Astley - You hearts been aching but you're too shy to say it
35. Full Conversion Cyborg - You wouldn't or couldn't go through with the whole procedure, glitches are common
36. Arachnoid - A mild mannered spider, bitten by a radioactive man. You retain the worst traits of both man and arachnid.
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